The philosophers muse if no one’s there to hear the tree that falls it may not make a sound
But I heard on the news you hanged yourself with no one there to hear except the trees — did they hear you?
When you were a little girl
The other kids would push you, make you cry then laugh
When you grew a little older
Things began to look a little bleaker, doctors came said they could treat you
Sometimes things seem right but they don’t work out
Theory may be perfect but it’s wrong
One day we will open up our minds
And our trees will be heard
Doctor saw you in his rooms
Minutes later gave you pills to make you smile
Few months later cut your wrist
Checked you on the ward and gave you shock, then locked you up for your own good
The philosophers muse if no one’s there to hear the tree that falls it may not make a sound
Though the rest of the world may close their eyes, let those who seek to change their thinking come to you
IMPORTANT: the symptoms of psychiatric drugs withdrawal can sometimes look exactly like the “mental illness” that the medications were prescribed for in the first place.
People can become “psychotic,” anxious, or any other psychiatric symptom from drug withdrawal itself, not because of their psychiatric “disorder” or condition.
When someone goes off a psychiatric drug they can have anxiety, mania, panic, depression and other painful symptoms. These may be the same, or even worse, than what got called psychosis or mental disorder before the drug was taken. Typically people are then told that this proves their illness has come back and they therefore need the drug. However, it may be the withdrawal effect from the drug that is causing these symptoms.
Withdrawal symptoms do not necessarily prove you need a psychiatric drug any more than headaches after you stop drinking coffee prove you need caffeine, or delirium after stopping alcohol shows you need to drink alcohol. It just means your brain has become dependent on the drug, and needs time to adjust to being off it. Psychiatric drugs are not like insulin for a diabetic: they are a tool or coping mechanism.
Scientists used to believe that the brain could not grow new cells or heal itself, but this is now known to be untrue. Everyone can heal. A strong and healthy body with good lifestyle and positive outlook will help support and nurture your brain and body to heal. When you have been on psych drugs for years, it can however sometimes take years to successfully reduce or go off them. Many people on these drugs, especially long-term neuroleptic anti-psychotics, develop brain injury and damage. This may not be permanent, but sometimes people live the rest of their lives with these brain changes. You may find that the goal of going off completely might not be right for you. You may feel better staying on them, and decide instead to reduce your medication or stay at the same dosage, and focus on other ways to improve your life.
The Shock Doctrine - a short film by Alfonso Cuarón (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban; Children of Men) and Naomi Klein (No Logo; Fences and Windows; The Shock Doctrine); directed and edited by Jonás Cuarón.
我冀願有人把自己被「確診」或「誤診」為抑鬱症、躁鬱症、焦慮症、驚恐症、精神分裂等等名稱的人，言說這個經驗，那無以名況的，到底是一種怎樣的真實、構成怎樣的一個生活。Those who find they’re touched by madness, those who find themselves ridiculous, sit down next to me - in love, in fear, in hate, in tears……
起初，妳以為即使難過，幾個月、一個學期、一兩年、三五年下來就會好了。時光和人生可以用努力追回—— 並且人兒總是在13、14 歲或二十歲左右，coming of age 的人生卡口給斷定為精神病患—— 然後是三年、五年、十年或更長的光景，停學、失業，無法投進打工職業，無法穩續的活出一個身份…… 跌宕不能尋回，只能從憶述中賦予某種意義，但那個「意義」連自己也說服不了自己。而且，同時在忘記，藥物令人潵渙、令人忘記。
你說啊，「電擊治療」，不是Jack Nicolson 那齣「飛越瘋人院」、Bjork 那齣「Dancer in the Dark」和Angelina Jolin 那齣「Girls Interrupted」描述的那個時代裡才有的野蠻麼？但它在我城最先進的研究醫院裡還在做著。「先進」，僅在於病人每次都要全身痲醉，插呼吸機，四肢和頭顱被品質優良的護墊繃帶縛著，免除了肉體痛苦，去「電腦」。一星期兩次，廿多次才算一個「療程」，所有讀數記錄在案。「文明」，更在於病人是自願簽字接受治療，知悉醫療程序可能引致的後果，與人無尤。法律以人身安全為由剝奪你的人身自由，法律同時視你能夠自决判斷。
精神科醫生把我那趟旅行中的行徑和回來以後的各種後遺，診斷為「Bipolar affective disorder I /acute mania without psychosis」，著手治療，我受不住被廹害的想法央求母親設法讓我出院。在我的想像中，那個稱為醫院的地方在幹著齟齬的勾當，把少年送往別處給人狎玩，天花的壓紋藏了某種揭開世界的秘密的咒符……
我們時常安慰著人「唔好唔開心」、「唔好諗咁多啦」。「唔好」的意思其實是「唔准」，只是以這樣「不好」、「It is not good」的台詞勸導之。多言的人害怕沉默、害怕晦喑與一切曖昧、放逸。一個人要是感覺孤絕、對周圍的事情失去興趣，他被視為有問題，偏離秩序，曰之Dis-order。一個人要麼對一些事情狂熱，對世界、對人有了新活的感知而失了現實的打算，偏離秩序，曰之失調。行為，在醫生眼裡，由行為變成了癥狀，病就是給癥狀出現的形式、常項與異樣賦予一個推理的體制與系統。行為，在法律執業者與管理人眼中，作為法制懲處或賞報的甄準，同理亦然，法官的判詞常道「但考慮到被告……. 」彷彿罪行的厘定果真有理可循，實則要呈顯道德的操作性質。
